Written by Motaro, 4-28-96
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There were rumors of some hidden fighters with the names of Rain, Wind, and Snow. If these were really in the game, then that would only mean that the creators were VERY low on ideas for names. So at that rate, newcomers to Mortal Kombat 4, 5, and up could end up like this...

ROB: I'm new to Mortal Kombat, so you'll have to help me with the names, Greg.
GREG: Okay.
ROB: Allright, what's that guy with the brown mask.
GREG: Yup.
ROB: Yup's his name? Pretty stupid...
GREG: No! What's his name!
ROB: That's what I asked you!
GREG: I told you, What's his name!
ROB: Allright... you're asking me...
GREG: I'm not asking you anything! Why would I?
ROB: Greg! Who is that guy?
GREG: No! Who is the one with the grey mask on!
ROB: I was just gonna ask that! Who IS the one with the grey mask on?
GREG: Yes!
ROB: OK, so there's Yup with the brown mask, and Yes with the grey mask. Now,--
GREG: Huh? What's in the brown mask and Who's in the grey mask...
ROB: Wait, say I was using... the black robot--
GREG: No One.
ROB: Hmm?
GREG: No One's the black robot.
ROB: Someone must be the black robot...
GREG: Someone's the green robot.
ROB: I knew SOMEONE had to be the green robot. But how can NO ONE be the black robot?
GREG: Because that's his name.
ROB: So the black robot is THAT.
GREG: No, it's No One.
ROB: And the green robot is
ROB & GREG: Someone!
GREG: Exactly!
ROB: Whatever. So... I'm using "Someone"--
GREG: The green robot.
ROB: Yup, uh-huh. And Someone is against the guy in the grey mask.
GREG: What.
ROB: I'll repeat it. Someone is against--
GREG: I heard you the first time. What is the name of grey ninja.
ROB: [Sighs] THAT'S what I'M asking YOU!
GREG: And I'm telling ya! Now I'll talk about the guy with the laser glasses, Why.
ROB: Why not? And you haven't told be about the brown ninja--
GREG: What.
ROB: The brown ninja--
GREG: What.
ROB: THE BROWN NINJA!
GREG: WHAT!
ROB: What about the green ninja,
ROB & GREG: SOMEONE!
GREG: Now you're getting it!
ROB: Now I'm getting What?
GREG: That's the brown ninja!
ROB: WHAT? Forget this, I'm going to play MK3.
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